MS in a Bottle

.... or in a 9x12 envelope. (Whine alert!!!)

So my co-worker friend says to me, she says, "I don't understand how someone would read this book and turn it down," I says "I know!" Because I've rigged it so that when you turn the last page the manusript goes "Ka-ching! Ka-ching!" and my Mommy liked it and I didn't even use the scented pink and purple unicorn paper when I sent it to agents (I'm reserving that for my resume in case I ever want to change jobs).

On top of that, if Vin Diesel is doing Hannibal, how is he ever going to find time to play Coffin in the movie (which, of course, won't start filming until after the book has been released so maybe there's time after all) but I digress.

So here I've got my Young Adult Orwellian, Harry Potter novel with X-men undertones in the true tradition of Ray Bradbury which is a mouthful and would probably scare anyone in one sentence and leaves me with the question, "Where's my Mommy?!"

Millions of unformed action figures hang in the balance. They cry out to join the heaps of molded plastic toys that congregate under end tables in the heart of America (or one of the three piles in my living room). They dream of the day when they will swing their tiny plastic arms to champion the First Amendment and protect children everywhere from totalitarian pathos.

My clue stick was lost in the mail. If anyone has a used one that's been sitting idle in a closet, please send it my way.